Historical/ Intergenerational Trauma

I often find that new moms struggle the most in their new role when they themselves have experienced a traumatic childhood. I focus on development and relational trauma that leaves a lasting impact. We work together to learn to heal your inner child and re-parent yourself so that you can thrive in your role as a parent to your new little one.

I've had training and experience working with passed-down family of origin trauma that can create chronic anxiety, depression, anger, and in some cases C-PTSD (Complex post-traumatic stress disorder). By identifying the traumas and using somatic healing, you can be the one to break the cycle and live a better life.

I focus my individual clinical work on treating attachment trauma such as narcissistic abuse, adult survivors of childhood emotional and/or sexual abuse, and Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (also known as developmental trauma). I care deeply about supporting clients in understanding and recovering from these types of trauma because of their destructive effects on an individual's ability to enjoy life. Therapy can help you find balance and develop a healthy sense of self.

Dr. Shelby specializes in the treatment of religious and relational trauma.

For many of us, particularly those of us who are members of oppressed groups, the trauma we have experienced in this lifetime is only a piece of the puzzle. Our ancestors and the pain and unhealed wounds of their suffering can also be in our nervous systems, minds, bodies, and spirits affecting our psychological and physical health. I will always hold this truth in our work together and if you are interested we can explore those historical elements together.

I am very passionate about helping people through their past or present trauma, and sometimes even trauma that has been passed down from our ancestors and older family members. Trauma is a very general term to explain varying experiences we can experience in our lifetimes, or those before us, and it can weigh us down.

Trauma can affect people in different ways. I work with clients struggling with acute, chronic, or complex trauma.

Life experiences impact all aspects of our being, including our psychology, physiology and how we interact with others and ourselves. Because life experiences can affect us in such layered ways, the impacts of such life experiences can also be passed down in an intergenerational manner through interpersonal learning and biology. At times this may be obvious - like seeing a particular challenge, like violence, running through a family. Other times it’s more subtle, like realizing the different attachment styles that shape the way we react to the world. Sometimes we may even find ourselves afraid of something yet we don’t know why. Or we keep resulting to a coping strategy that does not serve us, yet we feel unable to do otherwise. Through a multi-modal approach that infuses relational, experiential and body-oriented approaches I help clients overcome intergenerational trauma, create healthy boundaries, increase resilience, reclaim their sense of self and create the lives they wish to lead.

Years of grappling with trauma has shown me something beautiful. Yes, we inherit post-traumatic stress. But we inherit post-traumatic growth too! We can rewire the ways our wise adaptive minds read information. Soothe the fear. Reeducate the vigilance. Keep potential trauma from becoming embedded. Trauma comes to our bodies through relationship, but healing does too. When we reshape how we safely show up in world, we heal & reveal our full Selves & pave the way for healthy whole-hearted children

In a safe and supportive environment, you'll discover how living in survival mode became normal for you while also developing tools that you can use in the real world to live a life that's calmer, more peaceful and more fulfilling.

Sometimes, as much as we know what we want to shed from our upbringing, from our relationships with our caregivers, we just can't seem to let it go. We learn new ways to do things, to grow, do better, and maybe to forgive or set boundaries, but the "stuff" is still there. I'd love to help you explore what's holding you back, heal what's been hurt, and help you find an authentic way to move forward in a way that works for you.

Most people think about trauma as a war or a near death experience, but in therapy we know that trauma is present when we see some specific symptoms that are usually results of an embodied, neuro-biological experience from a time where our brains and bodies were overwhelmed. In those moments it can seem like we don’t have access to the more philosophical and emotionally intelligent parts of ourselves.

Exploring one's family of origin often offers people a deeper answer to the question of "Who am I?

I have extensive training and experience in working with historic, intergenerational, and complex trauma through my time providing mental health services for NARA, NW and Wolf Pack Consulting and Therapeutic Services. As a relationship therapist, I understand how impactful historical/intergenterational trauma can be on a relationship system and focus much of the work on helping the couple/family identify this trauma and create strategies to minimize it's impact.

Did you know that, according to the EMDR Institute, there is biological evidence to suggest that intergenerational trauma is hereditary? The stress that comes from the trauma and adversity of generations before you CAN affect your stress. You are not your ancestors, and their story does not have to be your story. We can't control all the fucked up problems of the world, so let's focus on what is in OUR control. Let's work together to identify what advocacy looks like for you and heal.

I can provide EMDR therapy

Trauma doesn't come from nowhere. It is tied to family, community, and national history. It is connected to the long and many faceted systemic oppression that causes so much trauma. For me, most trauma is connected to the intergenerational. This is why in my work with clients I connect present experiences of symptoms related to trauma to past relationships, family history, community history, and more.

For many of us, particularly those of us who are members of oppressed groups, the trauma we have experienced in this lifetime is only a piece of the puzzle. Our ancestors and the pain and unhealed wounds of their suffering can also be in our nervous systems, minds, bodies, and spirits affecting our psychological and physical health. I will always hold this truth in our work together and if you are interested we can explore those historical elements together.

Unfortunately, trauma is much more common than we want to acknowledge. When I work with clients to address the impact of trauma, we first have to build safety, self-compassion, social support, and skills in managing intense emotions. We work to make sense of your story and to unlearn unhelpful patterns. This can feel like a scary journey, and it’s important that you feel supported and safe along the way.